Funny Things

Here's a quick list of the funny things that have happened in the last week:

• At dinner one night with a couple of co-workers, one of them was starting to tell a story in English and started like this, "You know how little kids have Superman shits growing up...?" What? Shits? "Yeah, shits...well..." No, explain Superman shits. "You know, like on your bed..." You mean sheets. "Oh..." Yeah, these kids with Superman shits need some kryponite!
• One day I was singing this song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VvcohzJvviQ and my co-workers just stopped and looked at me in shock. The song is about "peaches," but they thought I was singing, "Moving to the country, gonna get me a lot of bitches." Whoops...
• Also, I was talking to these same co-workers as we were walking to dinner, and one of them asked me explain how I knew this woman at the restaurant the night before was a prostitute. So, clearly not having any experience in the prostitute industry, I had a lot of explaining to do because, again, they looked at me in shock. I explained how this woman was alone at the bar, dressed very questionably, she had a martini, but wasn't drinking it. Was checking men out, but only the lonely ones, etc. I then made the comment that I will probably never live down, "I bet we could learn a lot about sales from prostitutes." What?!? Then I said, "I think I'm going to write a book about this...I'm not going to write the title on here, it's hilarious, but I fear someday it could come back and be taken completely out of context!